пятница, 17 октября 2008 г.

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четверг, 16 октября 2008 г.

section 255 affidavit




Today, was another good Thursday I started my day off getting my butt kicked by my trainer. I thought I was dying at the end of my workout... But in the end I am sure I will thank her. 3 more months left with her and then I will be finished and seeing and feeling the results.
I am thinking of starting something else because the basic workout. I could try tennis, Tai Chi, work on my horse back riding or start dancing again. Who knows what the new year will bring or what I will be able to do.
I then picked myself up, put myself back together and drove out to see my dearest friendapos;s new farm. It was pretty cool. (such a city girl sometimes) It was a great piece of property. I love the trees and the pond... I think the pond is my favourite It is so inspiring to my artistic side. It would be great to snap photos of, even paint. I am hoping to be able to sneak out again and get inspired We shall see.
After taking a tour, we heading off to a yummy lunch and debated life. It was great afternoon, and I feel a bit more energized again(it could also be from the load of vitamins and the coffee bar..but I am going to go with the company I was with and the places we went) It was to early to go home, so off to the barn I went. Where I got to spend my evening my other favourite person, my twin. We took the horses out for a ride around the field. That was all find and dandy until her horse got spooked, which spooked my horse and I was thrown off. My first fall and it was a good one. Nice and slow motion, landed on my back and whacked the crap out of my head. Thank goodness for helmets.
For, my injuries I was taken home to my other family. Where a hot shower, homemade Mexican food and wine were to help me out. Followed by a good session of Greyapos;s on the couch was the order. It was really a good day. But how else could it be when you get to surround yourself with your favourite people and getting to see their passions.

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среда, 15 октября 2008 г.

woopy goldberg



Yesterday I spend my time with my bestfriend Sue, hang out d Jollibee Tutong.. Of course we share latest news especially bout her brother.. The matter is complicated but of course the decision belongs to the brother himself.. Mudah-mudahan segala keputusan mendatangkan hikmah dan pengajaran... Mudah-mudahan jua Er buat keputusan yang betul n jgn terburu-buru n jgn menurut nafsu... Hope ia pikir dalam2,buka mata hati bukan decide menggunakan pemikiran yg di tutup leh nafsu.. Hmm nda bleh di teruskan ni, kang melalut ni jadinya

Anyway, last nyte i can#39;t sleep memikirkan sal our decision(me +hubby) to adopt his friend#39;s son Lum lagi buat kata putus The wife just gave birth last month and they can#39;t accept that their baby has heart complication and need treatment... It is not that they can#39;t afford the treatment but it#39;s just that they can#39;t accept the fact yg their first child got heart complication Farid realise that without the parents love n care the baby won#39;t heal lyk he heard that the baby is still in RIPAS� One more thing, the baby is Chinese... Juz yesterday afternoon i sat facing a chinese couple with their baby at the Jollibee Coincidence? Hehe tkanang #39;KungFu Panda#39;, "There is no accident"
I know it#39;s not an easy case� and memang bnyak dugaan utk menjaga� anak yg sakit,bnyak karenah... Alhamdulillah bila dengar cakap Shahnol lastnyte sdikit sebanyak membuka mata I know i can discuss this matter with him n even hubby pun tekanang cShahnol n asked me to seek guidance from him too To Shahnol, thanx alot
All in all, me n hubby discuss lagi this matter thoroughly, liat every aspect.. This morning i told Maseri and I don#39;t mind if she wants to adopt this baby as well As the parents pun letting the baby go, meaning durang rela lepaskan that baby and let urang lain jaga *sigh* Allahuakbar

Now my mind can#39;t stop thinking #39;bout the baby... Ish, Akmal lagi tym ni pasang lagu country yg mendayu-dayu, yg ku dngar liriknya, #39;i know i can.. I can#39;t stop thinking..... All in my mind#39; Lawa jua chorus lagu country ani hahaha tukarnya tia Akmal ah Hahaha now he play lagu #39;The Reason#39; by #39;Hoobastank? hehehe mcm tau ja.. No accident?

-Enah252-


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mourinho bio




Pursuant to my ambitions, I have cracked B. Alan Wallaceapos;s The Attention Revolution, a guidebook for shamatha practitioners. This fellow did some time as a Tibetan Buddhist monk, studying under the Dalai Lamaapos;s personal tutelage; he then got a physics degree from Amherst College, a Ph.D. In religious studies from Stanford, then taught at UCSB for a while. Heapos;s now director of an institute for "consciousness studies" in Santa Barbara, the goal of which is to provide a first-person perspective science of consciousness through the collaboration of neuroscientists and skilled meditators. (This confronts head-on Nagelapos;s objection of what itapos;s like to be a bat, or a monk: there are external markers for the state, but the idea is to allow oneself to observe oneself in detail and with some degree of reproducibility. I have been interested in where such a path might lead for quite some time now.)

Apart from the long list of bona fides, his prose reads well and makes sense. Iapos;ve done well with my physical workout program, and although I am perhaps motivated more by vice (self-confidence, self-image, girls) than by health reasons, the health reasons come along for the ride. ;) Motivation for meditation is going to be a bit different, but not egregiously so in terms of the day-to-day motivation and seeing it as important. If I do it for no other reason than that it makes me feel better at the end of the day, it will be worthwhile, but I can certainly hope other benefits will accrue.

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what is messianic




That these compounds mean something else? I admit it; I am struggling. I want to let go, but there is always something so compelling about hanging on. I miss you. I miss everyone of you. I miss the widespread lips of my bestfriend Polina and her smile and her heavy high cheeks smothering her eyes when she does. I miss the grin of my bestfriend Andre and how no matter what mean things he says, he still has the glimmer of love in his unusually shaped eyes and a hidden insight into how life carries on. I miss even being able to have the encouragement and support of Jonathan, where I was always reassured that after everything else this is nothing but another step towards something else. Then, thereapos;s Julianne, who provides a direction towards motivation and a sense of comfort. I miss being able to talk about things that may not even have any place in our own lives, but have something to do with the world we live in.

I miss Lukas, who may have like a small moon circling around a larger planet, still forgave God; both for his existence and his imaginary existence. Amanda was and still is a gripping potential "something," but is this a loyal confidant -- someone to relieve fear and agony, even when there is no hope. Poor Paula, poor emotional Paula put a perspective on life with her own ignorance and her own realities that it reminded me that there is something else than just science but a world of creativity.

Lastly, I miss Lev, who radiates a love and faith for life and all that exists in it. An innocence that we have all fought to maintain but have lost -- a sense that love is the most powerful thing, and then there is death.

Each person contributes so much to the next. Only when you begin to unravel do you see what glue kept you in one piece.

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Itapos;s been so long since Iapos;ve posted an entry on here...

Itapos;s been an interesting past couple of months....� I no longer have�a boyfriend, I have my own apartment, Iapos;m paying my bills all on my own, and I have hand surgery Friday.� I really havenapos;t had that much luck since all this crap started but�Iapos;m attempting to make the best of it.

I donapos;t even know if anyone will look at this or not, but I guess itapos;s just comforting for me to get all these thoughts out of my head� Iapos;ve been so stressed out lately between work and my personal life Iapos;m a MESS�

Iapos;m trying to get myself down to my lowest weight... Which is 118.� Yesterday I weighed myself and I�was 122.5- slowly but surely getting there� Iapos;m pretty sure I gained yesterday considering I ate�a soft pretzel.... Not the best idea I�know.

Okay- done for now

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вторник, 14 октября 2008 г.

lyric night still




�So far so good.
Since yesterday i lost
3 more pounds
18 in total
fasting works.

This is day 2 in my fasting period
and so is the last day�
and 1 thing that makes me nervous�
is that tommorrow is my grandmaapos;s
b-day and she is expecting me to eat.
Iapos;m like"i will" and in fact iapos;ll eat dinner
nothing else, but thursday iapos;m going to fast
and friday iapos;ll eat 500 cals.

I hate when my grandma start w/ the
"you havenapos;t eaten today and blah blah"
i donapos;t know what she worries about
Iapos;m not stick thin, iapos;m not even thin
i have enough fat in me to survive
for a month. =( i hate my body

A



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