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I suffer from insomnia.� Lately, iapos;ve been staying up all night and getting sleep during the day.� This is not good, so yesterday i was up for 25 hours straight so i could go to bed at 9pm last night to sleep.

Master and i talked about our relationship and where we are headed. We talked about getting back on track.� It had been far too long since we had done anything to concretely show our Master/slave relationship.� Since talking a few days ago on the change within and my having surrendered to Him - the difference between a submissive and a slave - He has started to issue more demands.� i also have my first punishment in a while lined up, a task i was asked to complete and did not will be done today, but there is a punishment already written down for this and that makes me feel good.�

Master is a big apos;Story of Oapos; fan and has wanted a slave to be as O in her mind, but also to be marked and pierced as O was.� i had told Him i would love to have the O piercing (labia) and that its up to Him how it should look and feel.� He already knew it was up to Him, i was just conveying the idea that i also knew and was surrendering this to Him.

Last night during the conversation, i explained this further.� If the choice was up to me, i would have the piercing the same as the one O had in the book, not the various movies.� If youapos;ve read the book, then you know it was big.� It was not pretty. It was bulky and big, coming down about 2/3s of her thigh.� Chunky and clanked against surfaces.� O knew she was owned with that.� This is what i want, to know i am owned by Master and everyone who ever sees it will know as well.� There will be no mistaking our relationship.� No submissive would ever allow herself to be tagged this way - but then iapos;m not a submissive.� Of course, it will have a small screw in it, so it can be taken out with an allen key when needed.� But i wonapos;t have access to that key.

He is also getting me the O slave ring from the movie.� He would have gotten the one from the book, but we both prefer the movie one more.�

i told Him about the various sites iapos;ve been visiting. That when i read about Men being naturally superior and a womanapos;s place is always in the home or on her knees to her Master, i get an excitement growing wihtin me.� It makes me incredibly horny, but more than that.� This is a deeper excitement i feel, not just clitoral arousal.� He seemed to get turned on by the idea that i was turned on by the thought of being inferior.� This is good news.� There is hope He will come to view me that way naturally.� Then there will be nothing stopping Him from literally doing with me what He wants.
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thumping sound in ear

You can stick your stupid lovey dovey Valentines day up your collective asses

I donapos;t give a monkeyapos;s ratchet that I have no one to cuddle up to

And why donapos;t I care, you ask Iapos;m getting my referal to CX GIC. Iapos;ve just got off the phone with the guy from the mental health and heapos;s said that I have a good chance of getting funding too.
Heapos;s told them that it would be in my own interest if I was seen by CX GIC.

**Falls to her knees and praise Hallelujah**


I feel strangely disconnected now but in a good way

I feel like Iapos;ve put a crossroads behind me on my journey through my sad, pathetic life

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De eerste week is heel snel voorbij gegaan. Heb inmiddels m'n draai een beetje gevonden. De contacten met de andere bewoners is heel goed, trek veel op met een paar man, beetje van dezelfde leeftijd, en die vergelijkbare dingen hebben meegemaakt.

Van de week de inschrijving bij het cwi afgehandeld, en ook bij de Gemeente. Afgelopen dinsdag gesprek gehad bij de gemeente over de sanering, en hier vandaag (vrijdag) de papieren voor ontvangen. Ben vandaag de hele dag al druk bezig om deze in te vullen de benodigde gegevens en informatie te verzamelen. Kom hiervoor wel op een wachtlijst te staan, maar dat maakt me niet, dan zit ik in ieder geval in de bekende molen.

Afgelopen woensdag op het arbeidsbureau geweest, en daar een leuk vacature gevonden, gaat om werk bij een callcenter in Emmeloord. Baan spreekt aan, en je moet toch weer ergens beginnen. Inmiddels daar op gesolliciteerd, en samen met m'n cv verstuurd, de sluiting hiervan is 19 februari a.s. Afwachten dus, en ondertussen zoek ik gewoon verder.

Deze week verder al een paar keer gekookt, en men is te spreken over m'n kookkunsten, en vanavond zal ik m'n kunsten weer proberen te laten werken, zal samen met Richie een wokgerecht in elkaar draaien, hier hebben we vanmiddag de boodschappen voor gedaan.

Begin verder een beetje tot rust te komen, slaap de laatste nachten ook weer goed, en de hulp die ik hier krijg is heel goed, ben ik heel blij mee. Vanmiddag een gesprek met een externe begeleider, dit om meer rust te krijgen en die tevens gaat adviseren hoe de overige zaken aan te pakken.

Morgen is het weer weekend, en wat we gaan doen weet ik nog niet dus dat zien we wel. Vanavond in ieder geval lekker relaxen en we hebben een paar goede films om te kijken.

Tot zover de eerste week, en volgende week hoop ik er weer wat neer te zetten.

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"Abgetaucht seit: Zwei Gigs, nur eine DVD mit l�ngst bekannten Youtube - Clips- 2008 mussten TH Fans durch die R�hre gucken. Die letzte CD "Zimmer 483" erschien am 23.2.2007 Im M�rz schl�gt nun die Stunde der Wahrheit: K�nnen Tokio Hotel mit ihren neuen Songs an alte Erfolge ankn�pfen oder schmieren sie voll ab?

Wer sind die Fans? Girls im Alter von 13 bis 17 Jahren. Es sind extrem treue Supporter, die f�r Bill Co durch Feuer gehen Eine breite Fan-front, die f�r Mega - Hysterie sorgt

Wie viele gibt es? Der harte Kern in Germany liegt bei 120.000 Fans (weltweit rund 3 Mio). Aber : Von Monat zu Monat springen immer mehr Supporter ab.

Chancen: Ziemlich gut Die Fans sind treu, die Band hat�s drauf"

Und dann noch ein anderer Artikel

"So weit weg und doch ganz nah: In letzter Zeit haben sich Tokio Hotel rar gemacht. Umso wichtiger wahr es den Jungs, Kontakt mit den Fans zu halten. Auf ihrer offiziellen Homepage zeigen sie immer wieder private News und Pics. "

(c)Popcorn
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So, i may be taking a job in philly. I would be completely new to the area and have no concept of location and such. Could anyone give me any idea of what areas would be good to live in and which ones to stay away from. When i say stay away, i mean YOU wouldnapos;t want to live there and you probably wouldnapos;t visit friends there. On another note, whatapos;s the local average wage there? thanks in advance
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